Happy New Year! For so long my life revolved around "2006". That seemed to be the year in the future - the year labeled to us since about 7th grade when the idea of high school seemed possibly near. And yet, here we all are in the year of our Lord, 2007. Next mile marker: 2011. That's the end of Yale, and seems riduculously far away. Delightful! So much to do in the meanwhile.
January has already had a large chunk taken out of her, and that means my 19th birthday is fast approaching. Saturday week I will gain another year. I couldn't be happier with 18! 18 saw the great end of L'ville, Biloxi, flying, CILTing at Cheley, Nepal, many new and strengthend old friends, and a deeper relationship with God, and a better understanding of my place in His universe and my need to develop that place further with Him. People all around me, especially in my family, are embracing the new year with great changes - new resolutions, new relationships, new goals. I can hardly keep up!
For the last two weeks I have been living and working in New Providence at my new restaurant job. I host and serve at Winberies, an American-style chain that has a nice hotspot in Palmer Square. The job is demanding in how little it requires of me. The business does not need me to function, and the general under-appreciation all the employees get can be generally disheartening. The place carries a lot of negativity - a simple "how are you?" often leads to a diatribe on how much said person hates their job. There is also a lot of vulgarity in my workplace, which is something I am currently struggling with. This is beyond the bubble, and I am sorely disappointed with many of my co-workers' tendencies in conversation. I truly do not aspire to work in the restaurant industry.
When I am hostessing, I stand up for many hours in a row. When people walk in, I smile, grab x number of menus, and seat them. Then continue standing. My thoughts have drifted many places, and I usually bring in a little moleskine journal to write down thoughts and many prayers. I sometimes sneak toward the kitchen and grab some French bread. The work is humbling. I have also developed over the last few days, a distaste for many kinds of food. Something about my combination of e.coli in Nepal and seeing food prepared so often has really turned me off of lots of food. I returned a burger at "The Office" the other night! It just looked too red to me. I have
never done that! Alice Grant was visiting for the night, and we had a good laugh about it. It was so good to see her! I really miss Lawrenceville friends, and I especially miss Lawrenceville fellowship. Just being with another Christian who knows you in so many ways is so freeing. To say a grace over a meal, to flip from boys to God to school... the ease in which our Lawrenceville talks danced lightly between such topics or acts was totally taken for granted. I had no idea how heavy such a skill in friendship was. I miss it terribly.
I packed my AT pack for the first time today for a total of 15 lbs without food or water. I am very, very please with this low weight. There are several items that have yet to be purchased, but I am comfortable with the current situation. Life is good. The weather has begun to nip... Finally! Phew. I was getting a bit ancy about our Earth.
It also turns out that the town of Summit does not enforce recycling. Big deal! My restaurant doesn't recycle, and I have a big issue with that. There is a massive amount of waste put out by the companies here. I have no idea where to start. I'll probably just tell Perrykins about it and let her save the Earthen day.
I was delighted to receive three great e-mails today. One from a Nepali girl I met in a lodge in Khumjung Nepal, who is studying in Kathmandu. The others were from Kali and Bama! I love hearing from them, and was very impressed with their current work and attitude. What incredible people! If you want to read about it, check out kalimariestull.blogspot.com or ashleyzeiger.blogspot.com.
The world is seeming to be very... real... lately. Actions have real consequences - something I have always known, but seem to be really
understanding lately. I think my L'ville bubble is finally bursting. This job is showing me the working world - full of good hearts who choose to make good and bad choices that really have reflected on their current way of life. This and flyinig have made me feel very present to who I am. That if I leave myself I will lose either my life or my integrity, all in a flash. All day we cater to the prepster crowds of Summit, New Jersey, and for what! For a nice meal, a quiet moment away, a date, a reunion. While all the time, your service is making cracks about you, rushing about, favoring certain customers, sneaking outside for cigarettes. I know I am myself harboring a bit of negativity toward this whole affair. Work - when your mind and heart are not passionate about it - is
not fun.
I feel so restless! So ready to get away from this job and get outside, get out into the wilderness and be with people who are more deliberate about their lives. Many of my co-workers have great hopes and are very cool, but I am surprised how much some of the others can be a suck on my outlook. Wanting the AT is a serious dream of mine now... and working right now is what needs to happen to make that dream happen. Following dreams to their ends is no walk in the woods. It's a certain level of grit that will bring you there at the end of the day (or beginning, as the hours have slipped into the 13th).
Find a job you love. Always respect those serving you, and never assume anything about them. People are like messy closets that keep turning up more and more interesting memories, if you just take the time to sift through them. Honestly, I just wish the damn jokes would stop. My head is still in the clouds!
